Thursday, April 14, 2011

just another chapter in my storybook of life...

So, I start this blog with very little direction and convinced I won't end up posting it. But, we'll see.

Oddly, my favourite compliment to receive these days on a regular basis is from my closest friends praising this quality I have developed to only speak the very blunt truth about myself.
I've actually never liked blunt people. I used to think they were mean and offensive (and obviously wrong if they were pointing out one of my faults!)
With life experience though, I have realized life is so much easier if you always speak and hear the truth. There is no faking who I am. If you are a blog follower already, I am sure you have gathered I don't hold much back about myself and that I am a pretty open book.

Publicly though, one thing I hold back personal information on is my love life.
I was in this really toxic and unhealthy relationship for many years. The kind that you need to write every single day on his facebook wall:

"I love you booboo poopoo soooo much! You are the best boyfriend everrrr xoxoxox"

And not because you want to tell him that he's the best, or that you love him. It's to claim your territory over all the girls he's sneaky inbox messaging behind your back.
Ya, that kind of relationship. It makes for a very public and embarrassing break up. Don't do it girls.

Anyway, because of this I have kept my love life on a serious down low. So low I usually don't even tell my family. (with the exception of my loving siblings, of course.)
It's just easier that way. I'm 28. My mom, her mom, and her mom's mom all had 3 or more kids at my age. So when I mention I'm dating, they start planning a wedding. It makes my heart get palpitations thinking about it. 
In my storybook life, the next line would definitely be:

'Lions and tigers and bears, oh my!
Babies and husbands and houses, aahhhh!!!!' 

... I kid ;)
I do want to love someone so much that I want to spend my life and have children with them. One day.
Am I anywhere near ready for that? Nowhere.

Since my break up I've been in what my friends refer to as an 'emotional shut-out' for a few years now. I will like a guy for five minutes and then pick out all the reasons why he definitely sucks and end it. Or pick someone that it would never work with and is the worst match in the world for me so it ends naturally.
To be honest, until recently I wan't sure if I was capable of having those crazy butterfly feelings ever again. Turns out, I can. What's worse? The first guy I felt those crazy feelings for, just dumped me.
Yup. Taste of my own medicine? Coming from the girl who preaches positive Karma for a living, I guess I should have known!

Why-oh-why am I sharing this brutally honest truth with you all? I swear there is a point to this blog I am reluctantly writing. So, here it is.

Last Monday, I started the 'Feel Great in 8' challenge with all of my clients on www.eatingpretty.com. It is an awesome program where we all tighten up our diets and eat perfectly pretty and discuss our progress in the forum, just on time to rock our summer wardrobes.
Turns out last Monday, I was also invited to Dumpsville. Awesome.

So, I wrote in the forum on www.eatingpretty.com that evening at about midnight to tell my Pretty-Eaters what had happened. I was proud to announce I had come home from a tear-filled girl hangout and headed straight to my kitchen to make tilapia and spinach salad for my last meal, and prepare all sorts of prettiness for my next day. And to be honest, it felt good.

In the past, I would have demanded my girls come over every single night for at least the next 2 weeks. Admittance to my apartment would have been one bottle of wine and pizza pizza on the speed dial. Alcohol to numb the feelings and food for comfort. It's the automatic go-to break up remedy. Isn't it?
Normally, I would eat carelessly, cocktail hour would be a staple in the schedule and I would wake up a few weeks later - still sad and a lot unhealthier.

My best friends (oddly both male and female) have been pushing me to write this in a blog to share with more than just my team. Obviously, you can see why I am reluctant to post this - but it's the truth.

Don't get me wrong, I think a night of fun with the people you love the most is good for the soul. A planned party is the best kind of party and everyone needs to blow off some steam once in a while.
But what I have learned is that day-to-day life needs to be valued more. Eating Pretty is a lifestyle. It's not always easy when your heart hurts, you've had a stressful week or you are busy - but it is worth it!
Your life is important. Your body is the vessel that carries you through this life and it deserves respect.
Don't give up your power to live a Pretty lifestyle to anyone or anything.

Replace your bad habits with good ones so when you are in a situation of stress, you can turn to things that make you happy instead of things that give you a temporary fix of numbness.

My favourite things to do are;
Read extremely girly novels with pink covers, soak in a bubble bath with candles lit, cuddle up with my best girls and gossip or watch reality TV, take a hot yoga class, get a manicure, do something to make someone else's day better like call a client personally or make a video blog with a positive message and above all I love to write out my feelings. 
The elephant on my chest always seems to walk away after a good rant onto my laptop!

Sad parties will end. Love yourself first and only live your life the way that feels good inside. Yes, there will still be tough times. Yes, they still hurt a lot. Even though it hurts at the time, I am a strong believer that everything happens for a reason. The tough times are just the chapters to make the good endings feel even better later. If it doesn't make sense now, it will one day. Always does.
If you focus on the good, things always have a way of working themselves out. And there is always a bunch of loving ladies ready to offer their support on the eating pretty nutrition members forum, so be a part of it today!



Pictured: Team of Pretty Eaters always here to support!

7 comments:

  1. Awesome Post my sister !!
    When you face things head-on that’s how you over come obstacles. What doesn’t kill you simply make you stronger. Great writing!
    Loveeee you.

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  2. Thanks for your honesty! You have come a long way from your "i love you boo boo" days that is for sure!

    You have found yourself, you are comfortable with yourself and you become a stronger person everyday! I applaud your strength in dealing with your break up, where most of us would have felt sorry for ourselves and ate a tub of ice cream, you stayed true to your pretty self and fought the urge to eat ugly and be bummed out.

    Turning a not so great experience into a positive learning lesson is an amazing quality that you have, thank you for sharing :)

    A xo

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  3. Angela,
    I am so glad that you wrote this. I know this is a really hard time for you and I'm proud that you are being honest with the Pretty Eaters, your friends and family. Its not always easy to step back and take a look at yourself from the outside. If you want to make a change, you have to stick with it. It isn't all or nothing right off the bat. A pretty lifestyle is about slipping up sometimes, making mistakes and coming back stronger from them. In the past we have all grabbed a bottle of vino and a bag of chips, but in the end where does that get us? You said it...nowhere!
    You will find love and have those butterflies, probably a couple more times and I can't wait to experience the ups with you can pick you up from the downs!
    xoxox

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  4. Word sister! I SO appreciate your honesty and I think this post is something that we can all relate too...I'm so glad you're not in the booboopoopoo phase anymore either.

    Spread positivity and expect positivity!

    Love love you!
    Xo A

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  5. Ang I love this blog!! This is the second time I have read it and every time I take something more from it. I LOVE LOVE LOVE that you take the situation and do positive things with it. Some of us ladies focus on the negative but I love how you encourage to do great things for yourself!! It's the best way to find yourself again and get back out there:)
    Amazing Post!! Love you xoxo S

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  6. i think hearts just broke all over the world of all the boys you've let go of before, knowing someone stole your heart.
    whoever that guy is was lucky and will realize he made a big mistake cause they always do.
    What a great Blog. I havent met you but I follow your blog and love all the messages you send.
    I lost my power to my ex and i love seeing that other strong women like you fight the same things.

    thank you for your honesty. i sent this to all my friends.
    xoxo
    Jennie F.

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  7. Charming and hilariously witty.
    Love to follow a strong young woman speaking the blunt truth.
    Inspiring. Keep going, you have something here.

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